An Ageing Gen Xer Gets Schooled
A chat about language, labels, writing, queerness and mischief
Coming early next week: my 2026 Reading Challenge, and thanks to all those who read, commented and shared my post Words I Hate, from an English Teacher. I requested some words that I wanted to use in a future post, and they will all be featured in this one (how on earth am I going to naturally weave in words like rhizomatic, snollygoster and mother pus bucket? We shall see.)
Also, check out my profile, “I’m nearly half a century old now, and I still haven’t got it figured out” in we’re all getting older.
Substack is a strange and wonderful place. Occasionally, it rewards your snark with a podcast appearance.
This episode with Caitlin E. Myers was recorded in August 2025 and only posted in December, after what I assume was a painstaking editing process and/or a deliberate attempt to test my patience. She certainly took her sweet time.
Caitlin and I met on Substack after I left a snarky comment on one of her notes. She retaliated, naturally. From there, we bonded over mutual mockery: she enjoys Britishisms, I enjoy pretending I’m not old and out of touch culturally, and she enjoys reminding me that I very much am. We quickly became friendly arch-nemeses.
Eventually, we decided to record a podcast together, though there was some early confusion about who was actually hosting. Was this my podcast or hers? I still couldn’t tell you.
The conversation ties in neatly with my recent post on the words I hate, particularly “normal.” Along the way, Caitlin also educated me on the origins of spill the tea, which came as a genuine revelation (hint: drag culture, ballrooms, the 1980s).
We covered a lot of ground. A slightly more restrained outline is below.
Navigating Cultural Lexicons: A Podcast Chat on Language, Writing, and Queer Identity
Find out more about Caitlin at CEM Writes or on her Substack page (though she is currently ‘hibernating’ until the spring).
A rough outline of our chat
How we met on Substack (and why I mocked her original newsletter name)
Whose podcast this actually was
Writing books: promotion, branding, genre-blending, and selling without selling your soul
Why I don’t understand romantasy, and my research into niche erotica
Writer communities, connection, and what ‘success’ even means
How cemeteries are an underrated place to meet potential partners
Grifters and people selling creative shortcuts
Falling out of love with writing fiction
Language change, slang, and the difference between spilling the beans and spilling the tea
What ‘normal’ means - in classrooms, culture, and queer identity
Teaching language in Eastern Europe and explaining why certain words aren’t okay
Labels, wokeness, cultural translation, and what can be said in fiction
My naïve and idealistic take on dispensing with labels
US vs UK English (“Can I bum a fag?”)
Advice for younger writers about sharing work publicly
AI slop, bots, and how to stay human
Caitlin insults me one last time over my age, email address, and lack of cultural knowledge, berating me for not watching classic British TV like Peep Show
I declare the greatest streaming series of all time
A story the Nazis tried to burn...based on actual historical events.
As the world enters an era of uncertainty in 1928, a hidden queer community struggles to find love and acceptance in this compelling LGBTQ+ historical fiction novel.
Cara O’Shea encounters her first look at a fully nude female figure in Die Freundin, and her life is never the same again. When her strict Catholic family finds the magazine in her closet, she is forced to flee to the liberating streets of Berlin, where she finds herself at the heart of the city’s queer cabaret scene. She gets a job at the famous club Eldorado, and finds joy in creating extraordinary costumes for her new queer friends.
Her world darkens as the Nazi’s shadow looms over Berlin, and Cara faces new fears when her newfound community and future become threatened. As the fascist regime strengthens its hold, impossible choices arise, with tragedy waiting just around the corner.
Get it here or from the usual worldwide retailers. I highly recommend this book - I read it last spring and thoroughly enjoyed it.
Even the rough outline is brilliant. I like how you open with an insult and end with an insult - sounds like you two have a real 'snark'. (Get it? Does that even work?!)
"Can I bum a fag"? 😂 I'm usually quite careful and am able to use American/British slang interchangeably, but I slipped once, referring to my 'bumbag' as a 'fanny pack' in front of a (male) British acquaintance 🙈 To say he was amused would be a massive understatement 😂