About two weeks ago I "unfriended" and unfollowed several people and pages on Facebook. I don't spend more than 5 minutes a day there now because I can't take it. I've never had Instagram, am adamant about avoiding TikTok and I only accidentally started a YouTube channel when I went there to follow someone who does a podcast here on Substack that I like. I'm on LinkedIn more out of obligation (responsible, professional adults should be, shouldn't they?!)...
But the exchange you began this post with was perfect validation for my decision to cut ties with a lot of people on Facebook. The manner in which the woman you were confronted with "engaged" with you is a direct reflection of how I've seen "friends" there behaving and I find it atrocious.
Smart moves on your part, and so much of that behaviour is atrocious. I should've pointed out, perhaps, that I feel I have a healthy social media attitude - meaning, I spend little time there, and 90% of my time is on Substack, which as we all know, is ALWAYS time well spent!
I do feel like it's a necessary evil - such a harsh way of putting it, I know - if I want to make a living writing/teaching. We hear so much about multiple income streams and as an unemployed layabout (I checked with Berlitz, btw, no openings in Vienna at the moment), I'm thinking of ways to make this viable. I really have no idea what I'm doing, but I'm willing to give it a try. I can hardly believe I've started a TikTok, but there is a decent-sized language learning audience there (judging from the numbers of followers other language teachers have).
LinkedIn? I'm struggling to figure out how that place works, but then again, I'd hardly call myself responsible or professional! 🤣
I completely understand that it's necessary if you're looking to earn without being tied to an employer. Using it professionally is absolutely fine. It's the people that dwell and lurk there, picking fights, slinging insults, looking for any excuse to tear others down or (on the "flip side" as young people say), spend their days presenting their friends/followers with perfectly illustrated (orchestrated?!) updates on their perfectly polished lives on an hourly basis - I find both very annoying. I'm aware there's almost no way around it as a creative or someone wanting to establish independent income streams...
Most of the people on LinkedIn are not that responsible or professional either, but being there makes them appear that way 😁
It's those perfectly polished lives and the orchestrated/illustrated (I don't know either?!) that drive me crazy the most. I have a friend who I think has achieved influencer status (40k followers? Maybe not) and her IG stuff is the polar opposite of what life is really like. There she is with highly polished videos with her and her husband, pretending to be happy (I know the reality), and now she has a 2nd kid on the way and is pushing the whole happy family thing. What a fraud, huh?
Tell me about it 🤦🏻♀️ I could come up with dozens of examples from my own networks. I don't begrudge people their success or happiness, I just have a hard time believing that anyone who is truly successful and happy would constantly feel the need to rub it in others' faces.
That pic at the end is so funny! I was going to highlight the word 'cranky' before you mentioned it - it's one of my faves. I think there's a piece in how insults betray our age - that lady definitely had some great ones. Perhaps this could be a reason to engage with these people, as sort of anthropologic research. There must be an article in this, if not a Venn diagram at least.
You didn't mention Only Fans as a platform - I've heard Lilly Allen makes an income from posting videos of her feet now...
You handled that troll masterfully for someone who maintains that he is mostly new at social media. It was thrilling to see how easy it is to get them riled up simply by being factual and throwing their behavior back at them. I have always approached trolls the same way - nothing shuts them down more quickly than someone who maintains an even keel around (and even a kind of sympathy for) such egregious social behavior clearly meant to inflame and distract.
Also, LinkedIn in exactly as you describe it - weird and creepy with a neediness that is unsettling. I have found that platform to be mostly useless, especially when it comes to my writing.
Haha, I love your use of 'maintains', almost implying that I'm actually an old pro masquerading as a mere amateur 😂 LinkedIn, IG, TikTok - definitely new. FB, less so, but I usually just pop in, announce my latest Substack post, and hope for the best.
I suppose there are some similarities with Substack when it comes to likes and hearts, but on LinkedIn I'm now connected to some 400+ fellow EFL professionals (a few are former colleagues) and I've been promoting my books there and I can see 200+ impressions or post views and yet only a smattering of likes. I figured it would be a decent place to reach my target audience of language learners. Come on, language teachers, recommend my books why don't you?! 😳
Oh my god this was hilarious bed time reading , I couldn’t stop laughing, that argument was the best ! And your attempts at social media hahhahaha ! It’s all so true , everything is so hard today and add in that two face Authenticator crap ?! I’ve just deactivated my facebook and reactivated my TikTok, I tried to advertise my substack on it but no one’s interested 🤣 as I’m not doing videos of myself I think , that’s what the gen z do ! Good luck 🤞
Be careful reading anything I write before bedtime, it might give you nightmares 😂
I'm not kidding when I say I wrote 900 words and then deleted it, and I really want to write a long, boring post about my struggles with tech - the two factor Authenticator thing is definitely on the list. This is the kind of thing - grumbling about tech - that I find hilarious but I think a lot of people are bored by it. And now, for the 3rd time, I'm locked out of my LinkedIn account due to 'suspicious activity' - what the...? They keep doing this to me. Clearly a sign that I should NOT be using it. It's not meant to be.
Gotta figure out how to keep the TikTok thing going - I notice that everyone else has so much better camera quality, my computer (less than 2 years old) is a piece of shit it appears. So's my new microphone I bought specifically for these purposes!
I’ve given up on LinkedIn. Just need it for professional reasons. Only use insta for holiday photos to make everything jealous (jk). Attempted to learn TikTok, then deleted it. I’m too or for that shit. So you might be too? Hehe.
I'm ready to give up on LinkedIn - is it a normal thing just to get 'hi' messages? I also got a simple 'thank you' message. Thank you for what? Am I supposed to respond?
I'm definitely too old for all this shit - but that's part of my 'brand' schtick. Play up the cranky old technophobe grandpa angle (not like it requires me to do too much acting 😂)
Threads, I tried. Can’t be bothered. Haha. LinkedIn is just a weird place. I dunno what to say. I constantly get messages about helping me get leads for services I don’t even offer. 🙈
What a great read! You comments to your Facebook "friend" were brilliant. The whole online presence thing is such a tricky one to navigate if you are not that used to it/don't like it that much. I started my Substack because I'd been told it was important to grow an audience, but it's endless really, you could spend all your time building an audience on different platforms and never actually write anything else. I'm really sure you willl do great though on TikTok and wherever else you decide to pop up. I think you are a natural! Though coming from me (zero social media and an introvert) that may not be much of a compliment 🤣
Thank you! I know the feeling of building an audience and the time commitment. On Substack at least, I don't think of it too much that way - I just find it fun, but I am definitely not spending enough time on my 'proper' writing, as in books (the things that'll make me money!) I appreciate the compliment re: TikTok, I'll take whatever I can get. I may even quote you and use it for promo purposes: "Take it from me, an introvert with zero social media, Daniel is a natural!" People will flock to my page 🤣
I don't really know how to navigate, my 'strategy' is a constantly evolving process.
What do you think of the quirky YouTube idea I have - I hinted at this in the post, but here it is: drunk English lessons. I'll be looking for my first guinea pig and it's meant to be a proper English lesson but using one of my teaching philosophies and I think it can be beneficial/entertaining.
I had watched your tiktoks before I commented ofc! I have no experience/knowledge of growing a YouTube channel so can’t give you a useful opinion but my unuseful opinion is that it sounds fun, might as well try it 😀
Substack is the first social media I have allowed myself to communicate on in years. I removed myself from oter platforms to lessen the toxicity I see/deal with. The interactions displayed here reinforce my decision.
I am embarrassed to admit that I did not have much to do with politics until I turned 30, I just had no interest in it. That being said, I knew that I was not educated in any political topic, so I would keep any thoughts I had to myself when I was around a political conversation. That is something not many people are able to do. I see all too often people who shout out misinformation as facts because they do not research a topic before forming their opinion. I think that is the reason it is so difficult to have a political conversation when people have differing opinions.
Sorry for my short rant there... and sorry you had to deal with such idiocracy on social media, goes to show that 'common sense' is not very common these days.
No need to apologise for your rant, Cara, I always appreciate a good rant, and thanks for sharing your thoughts. I should've pointed out in my post that overall I have a healthy relationship with social media. Almost all my time is on Substack, which is such a pleasant place (and may it continue to be so).
Nothing embarrassing about admitting your lack of political engagement. It reminds me of a quotation, and I'm afraid I forget who said it: "It's no easy to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don't say it." All of these people spouting their opinions on FB and elsewhere should be adhering to that approach.
It was really just the news with Ukraine that prompted me to get involved. I hit that breaking point but it's not something I'll be repeating. I've written before about my dilemma - a lot of my readers/followers and potential audience is still active on FB, IG and TikTok and so it's really about doing the bare minimum there to attract people. Let's see how long it lasts. I know people say you need to engage on other platforms and it's a two-way thing, but I'm hoping to share my stuff, do my thing over there and hope I gain some followers.
About two weeks ago I "unfriended" and unfollowed several people and pages on Facebook. I don't spend more than 5 minutes a day there now because I can't take it. I've never had Instagram, am adamant about avoiding TikTok and I only accidentally started a YouTube channel when I went there to follow someone who does a podcast here on Substack that I like. I'm on LinkedIn more out of obligation (responsible, professional adults should be, shouldn't they?!)...
But the exchange you began this post with was perfect validation for my decision to cut ties with a lot of people on Facebook. The manner in which the woman you were confronted with "engaged" with you is a direct reflection of how I've seen "friends" there behaving and I find it atrocious.
Smart moves on your part, and so much of that behaviour is atrocious. I should've pointed out, perhaps, that I feel I have a healthy social media attitude - meaning, I spend little time there, and 90% of my time is on Substack, which as we all know, is ALWAYS time well spent!
I do feel like it's a necessary evil - such a harsh way of putting it, I know - if I want to make a living writing/teaching. We hear so much about multiple income streams and as an unemployed layabout (I checked with Berlitz, btw, no openings in Vienna at the moment), I'm thinking of ways to make this viable. I really have no idea what I'm doing, but I'm willing to give it a try. I can hardly believe I've started a TikTok, but there is a decent-sized language learning audience there (judging from the numbers of followers other language teachers have).
LinkedIn? I'm struggling to figure out how that place works, but then again, I'd hardly call myself responsible or professional! 🤣
I completely understand that it's necessary if you're looking to earn without being tied to an employer. Using it professionally is absolutely fine. It's the people that dwell and lurk there, picking fights, slinging insults, looking for any excuse to tear others down or (on the "flip side" as young people say), spend their days presenting their friends/followers with perfectly illustrated (orchestrated?!) updates on their perfectly polished lives on an hourly basis - I find both very annoying. I'm aware there's almost no way around it as a creative or someone wanting to establish independent income streams...
Most of the people on LinkedIn are not that responsible or professional either, but being there makes them appear that way 😁
It's those perfectly polished lives and the orchestrated/illustrated (I don't know either?!) that drive me crazy the most. I have a friend who I think has achieved influencer status (40k followers? Maybe not) and her IG stuff is the polar opposite of what life is really like. There she is with highly polished videos with her and her husband, pretending to be happy (I know the reality), and now she has a 2nd kid on the way and is pushing the whole happy family thing. What a fraud, huh?
Tell me about it 🤦🏻♀️ I could come up with dozens of examples from my own networks. I don't begrudge people their success or happiness, I just have a hard time believing that anyone who is truly successful and happy would constantly feel the need to rub it in others' faces.
I escaped FB and am enjoying my freedom.
That pic at the end is so funny! I was going to highlight the word 'cranky' before you mentioned it - it's one of my faves. I think there's a piece in how insults betray our age - that lady definitely had some great ones. Perhaps this could be a reason to engage with these people, as sort of anthropologic research. There must be an article in this, if not a Venn diagram at least.
You didn't mention Only Fans as a platform - I've heard Lilly Allen makes an income from posting videos of her feet now...
I'm already active on Only Fans, I have quite a huge following, but I didn't want to talk about it here, need to separate business from pleasure 🤣
🤣of course. And it’s not nice to boast
No need to boast. The comments there speak for themselves 🤣
You handled that troll masterfully for someone who maintains that he is mostly new at social media. It was thrilling to see how easy it is to get them riled up simply by being factual and throwing their behavior back at them. I have always approached trolls the same way - nothing shuts them down more quickly than someone who maintains an even keel around (and even a kind of sympathy for) such egregious social behavior clearly meant to inflame and distract.
Also, LinkedIn in exactly as you describe it - weird and creepy with a neediness that is unsettling. I have found that platform to be mostly useless, especially when it comes to my writing.
Haha, I love your use of 'maintains', almost implying that I'm actually an old pro masquerading as a mere amateur 😂 LinkedIn, IG, TikTok - definitely new. FB, less so, but I usually just pop in, announce my latest Substack post, and hope for the best.
I suppose there are some similarities with Substack when it comes to likes and hearts, but on LinkedIn I'm now connected to some 400+ fellow EFL professionals (a few are former colleagues) and I've been promoting my books there and I can see 200+ impressions or post views and yet only a smattering of likes. I figured it would be a decent place to reach my target audience of language learners. Come on, language teachers, recommend my books why don't you?! 😳
Oh my god this was hilarious bed time reading , I couldn’t stop laughing, that argument was the best ! And your attempts at social media hahhahaha ! It’s all so true , everything is so hard today and add in that two face Authenticator crap ?! I’ve just deactivated my facebook and reactivated my TikTok, I tried to advertise my substack on it but no one’s interested 🤣 as I’m not doing videos of myself I think , that’s what the gen z do ! Good luck 🤞
Be careful reading anything I write before bedtime, it might give you nightmares 😂
I'm not kidding when I say I wrote 900 words and then deleted it, and I really want to write a long, boring post about my struggles with tech - the two factor Authenticator thing is definitely on the list. This is the kind of thing - grumbling about tech - that I find hilarious but I think a lot of people are bored by it. And now, for the 3rd time, I'm locked out of my LinkedIn account due to 'suspicious activity' - what the...? They keep doing this to me. Clearly a sign that I should NOT be using it. It's not meant to be.
Gotta figure out how to keep the TikTok thing going - I notice that everyone else has so much better camera quality, my computer (less than 2 years old) is a piece of shit it appears. So's my new microphone I bought specifically for these purposes!
Funny. You forgot about Bluesky.
I’ve given up on LinkedIn. Just need it for professional reasons. Only use insta for holiday photos to make everything jealous (jk). Attempted to learn TikTok, then deleted it. I’m too or for that shit. So you might be too? Hehe.
And Threads! I can't keep up.
I'm ready to give up on LinkedIn - is it a normal thing just to get 'hi' messages? I also got a simple 'thank you' message. Thank you for what? Am I supposed to respond?
I'm definitely too old for all this shit - but that's part of my 'brand' schtick. Play up the cranky old technophobe grandpa angle (not like it requires me to do too much acting 😂)
Threads, I tried. Can’t be bothered. Haha. LinkedIn is just a weird place. I dunno what to say. I constantly get messages about helping me get leads for services I don’t even offer. 🙈
My arguing on Facebook days are long behind me. I bear the scars of Brexit and Boris Johnson's tenure as Prime Minister.
I think I'm one and done. I'll call it the most fun I never want to have again.
Yeah, that about nails it!
What a great read! You comments to your Facebook "friend" were brilliant. The whole online presence thing is such a tricky one to navigate if you are not that used to it/don't like it that much. I started my Substack because I'd been told it was important to grow an audience, but it's endless really, you could spend all your time building an audience on different platforms and never actually write anything else. I'm really sure you willl do great though on TikTok and wherever else you decide to pop up. I think you are a natural! Though coming from me (zero social media and an introvert) that may not be much of a compliment 🤣
Thank you! I know the feeling of building an audience and the time commitment. On Substack at least, I don't think of it too much that way - I just find it fun, but I am definitely not spending enough time on my 'proper' writing, as in books (the things that'll make me money!) I appreciate the compliment re: TikTok, I'll take whatever I can get. I may even quote you and use it for promo purposes: "Take it from me, an introvert with zero social media, Daniel is a natural!" People will flock to my page 🤣
🤣🤣🤣 But just cus I don’t have social media or extrovert qualities doesn't mean I don't have good taste 😊😊
I'd never dare suggest otherwise 😉
I hope you’ll keep doing updates on your tiktok journey, I am genuinely extremely interested in seeing how you decide to navigate it
I'm glad at least 1 person cares!☺️
Feel free to check it out if you haven't already: tiktok.com/@danielpuzzogrumpy
I don't really know how to navigate, my 'strategy' is a constantly evolving process.
What do you think of the quirky YouTube idea I have - I hinted at this in the post, but here it is: drunk English lessons. I'll be looking for my first guinea pig and it's meant to be a proper English lesson but using one of my teaching philosophies and I think it can be beneficial/entertaining.
I had watched your tiktoks before I commented ofc! I have no experience/knowledge of growing a YouTube channel so can’t give you a useful opinion but my unuseful opinion is that it sounds fun, might as well try it 😀
It’s amazing to me how stupid & aggressive those types of commentators are. It’s almost like the have a leader that acts that way 😬
I first saw STFU in the late 80s . It was a notice trying to persuade the punters at the Jazz Cafe to keep the noise down and listen to the musicians.
Wow, I'm really behind on the times then. How have I missed that all these years?
Substack is the first social media I have allowed myself to communicate on in years. I removed myself from oter platforms to lessen the toxicity I see/deal with. The interactions displayed here reinforce my decision.
I am embarrassed to admit that I did not have much to do with politics until I turned 30, I just had no interest in it. That being said, I knew that I was not educated in any political topic, so I would keep any thoughts I had to myself when I was around a political conversation. That is something not many people are able to do. I see all too often people who shout out misinformation as facts because they do not research a topic before forming their opinion. I think that is the reason it is so difficult to have a political conversation when people have differing opinions.
Sorry for my short rant there... and sorry you had to deal with such idiocracy on social media, goes to show that 'common sense' is not very common these days.
No need to apologise for your rant, Cara, I always appreciate a good rant, and thanks for sharing your thoughts. I should've pointed out in my post that overall I have a healthy relationship with social media. Almost all my time is on Substack, which is such a pleasant place (and may it continue to be so).
Nothing embarrassing about admitting your lack of political engagement. It reminds me of a quotation, and I'm afraid I forget who said it: "It's no easy to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don't say it." All of these people spouting their opinions on FB and elsewhere should be adhering to that approach.
It was really just the news with Ukraine that prompted me to get involved. I hit that breaking point but it's not something I'll be repeating. I've written before about my dilemma - a lot of my readers/followers and potential audience is still active on FB, IG and TikTok and so it's really about doing the bare minimum there to attract people. Let's see how long it lasts. I know people say you need to engage on other platforms and it's a two-way thing, but I'm hoping to share my stuff, do my thing over there and hope I gain some followers.
Thank you for reading and your insights ☺️
If you are looking for inspiration re: YouTube content, I recommend this:
https://m.youtube.com/channel/UCV2tPNB5c4X36u5GaedDh4A
As usual, you are nothing but a tremendous help.
Okay, so I will start my own channel with images of me lying in the grass looking cute. I'm sure it'll reel people in.